i just deleted that last one because it reeked of irrationality and emotion.
most of what said stands true,
and i'm still looking into what i said,
but i'm not sure i'm ready for just everyone to know it.
cheers!

whoa.
it's only noon.
which should sum up nicely the rough winds of the morning.

not 10 minutes in, a full fledged tantrum regarding my presence,
"i don't WANT YOU HERE. you're RUINING MY MORNING"
this kid is like milady from the three musketeers.
you know this one?
an impeccable woman of society, the manners, the humor, etc,
and with hidden huge veins of anger and malice coursing through her.
scorned once, she goes and asks the cardinal to eliminate the gent.
aiya. a four year old milady.

late for tennis this morning, because the oldest couldn't find his runners,
but instead of looking for them with me,
continued to argue about wearing his flip flops.
OMG. his head was lucky to remain attached.
so racing, racing,
drive off in a huffy hurry,
only to discover once at the club that i cannot find my wallet.

sit uneasily through olivia's lesson, while the boys play crazy squash with a friend, and as soon as she's done,
race home,
look everywhere, the house, the car, the shed..nothing.
i'm seriously about to heave ho the ugly sob.

still frantic in the front yard, i see a bit of yellow walking towards me.
i look up and it's the gentleman from across the street in the orange house,
who, along with his partner i've always wanted to talk to, and get to know,
and he's holding my wallet.
he'd picked it up after it'd flown off the roof of the car.

i tear up and make a blubbery thank you and introduction blah blah.
and lovely him,
instead of being abhored at my tears,
looks at me like he'd wrap me up in his arms.
i'm crying as i write this
because i know now that it was god.
everything all wrapped up,
lessons, comfort, blessings,
there he was.



writing is CATHARDIC!!!

i really, really, really, really,
want to get this set one day.
i'm undecided if i should just get the whole thing in one go?
or should i hunt, one by one, until they are all mine?
how gorgeous will these look on a shelf?
ugh. awesome!

this evening i have a grandiose plan
to clean my apartment
whilst listening to edith piaf
drinking gin
and smoking cigarettes.
i may have to put my mad men dress on
to make the whole thing perfect.

today i woke late
had breakfast late
enjoyed the globe and mail
walked through gastown and downtown
and bought some broccoli.
i've declined two invites for tonight,
so as to just be in my own space.
i'm really, really, looking forward to it.

someone told me the other day that
paris is the place to be
for a single women in her 30's.
thats me! ...almost.
the person told me that
there is something about the city, about the age,
about that time in your life,
that weave together something altogether magical.
i'm really looking forward to this.

still lying in bed on the last day of my holiday..
i'm back to work tomorrow, and that's ok because it has been a spectacular time off.
you know those times when you travel
and you sort of say to yourself, lets just giver.
that was like this.
i breakfasted with friends nearly every morning,
saw a couple of matinee movies,
mid day beers at the beach,
late night beers at friends..
and so forth.

so good!

got back super late last night from bowen island.
sheree plett played a show there over looking the ocean,
and i met the crazy grieving guy from grey's anatomy that shot all the doctors.

i went swimming in seemingly the cleanest bit of ocean i've seen in a while. so clear and gorgeous.
now i have salt water hair. kinda messy. dirty. chic?

i have to go and get some coffee and breakfast. and it's 1pm!
oh holidays.

hey there.
miss me?
i claim summer-itis as my defense for not posting anything up here in a while.
seriously,
this past week, count them, 4 summery bbq's, dinners, and backyard concerts!
this little mouse has been busy as a bee and happy as a clam and nearly as tanned as snooki.
whoooaaa.
can i make a jersey shore reference, in all classiness?
just for any clarification of my reputation, i've never even seen ONE episode thank you very much.
but that orange lady pops up everywhere!

so i'm sitting here, day one of my week holiday nearly complete,
feeling pretty good, and relaxed to the max.
four more lovely days to go.
and yet, an overnight on bowen island is still ahead!

some sad news,
i'm on the cusp of selling my bike.
this lady was not deigned for the tininess of those tires.
i keep pinch flatting the tube.
oh it hurts though, beacause she's so gorgeous, and i feel so good riding her,
but we are not meant to be.
these final days have been filled with more rage and frustration than pride and love.
she shall be posted to craigslist imminintly.
a wider tire'd hybrid looms on my horizon as soon as i can secure funding.

since it's been a while,
have you seen this??
a gorgeous rendition of lisztomania by a bunch of elementary school kids??
and their amazing, loving teacher?
i have a feeling i'm late to this, but
check it out!!

also
here in vancouver,
some friends of mine are putting on a film and art festival centered around bicycles.
the main boys responsible are the zenga's
and boy are they a crazy bunch.
check out this rad website for a trailer of their film
(which i've seen, and is utterly fantastic!)


ok i think i'll end here.
if you're around and don't have plans for breakfast this week, let me know!
also if you'd like to purchase my bike, let me know!
love julie

i'm just sharing this everywhere because it's so damn awesome. the sneaky hate spiral. so much truth.

hoo ya!
a little more cleaning up to do here at work, and
then i'm OUTTA here for a five day weekend!
AND it's payday!

who can handle all these capital letters and exclamation marks??!!

heading out kayaking tomorrow on bowen island, which i'm super stoked about.
tonight i'm going to a wine and craft night, just like if i lived in, say, saskatoon.
thursday is going to be a super rad bbq for canada day, which can be summed up by the large sheet cake resembling a canada flag that sheree and i are making.

welzers,
why am i typing????
i need to get out of here!!!!!

smooch.

oh ya, garance dore has this great post on elegance beyond clothing. it's really nice. what we can all strive for as humanity. maybe. i like it. hmm. go and read it.

i brought my computer home from work this weekend
because as of late i've found an internet signal from my bedroom,
better yet, my bed!
so yes, at 4 on saturday afternoon,
i'm in my bed.
i have not travelled far from it in the three hours i've been awake.
last night i hosted a back alley bbq, behind my apartment building.
last night was really fun.
last night i drank too much.
now i'm not feeling well.
for the first hour i was up
all my thoughts were consumed with getting coffee,
and is there anyone who i can manipulate into bringing me some?
the answer being no,
i ended up doing a weird version of the walk of shame to the coffee shop on the corner,
shielding my eyes and shuffling as upright as i could manage.
then i fell down on the couch and watched real estate shows on tv.
my head is still pounding!

last night was a hoot though.
we emptied my apartment into the back alley
and created a living room with couches and cozy chairs.
i had only two short stools to use as tables,
so skinny tim went up the alley and came back with
a huge piece of plywood that we lay across,
et viola, a more than big enough table.
along the same vein,
chris did the same when we found ourselves short of chairs later on.
it's a good alley, this alley of mine.

until early this morning,
i had two belgians staying with me on my couches,
and they were in raptures as this was the only day and evening they were able to be in vancouver.

my head is still pounding and i have to go and get clean,
chris will be here in about 20 minutes and we will go to mosaic and do the music thing.
oh man.
advil, advil, advil.

love julie

i would like to tell you about the very best sandwich in all of vancouver.
and as i type this,
i feel you should know my hands are absolutely black.
they are covered in chalkboard paint and i cannot get it off.
but the wall looks great.

so, the very best sandwich.
it can be found at little nest on charles just off the drive.
prepare yourself though,
this place is insanely kid friendly,
and i just about went insane waiting for my sandwich. shudder.
i don't know how to lead into this with a verbal drumroll or something,
so,
its salami, roasted heirloom tomatoes, basil mayo and boconccini all of it served warm on toasted baguette.
swoon.
it's unbelievably savory, large, and gorgeously presented (to go that is. i afformentioned why i could never eat there).

go get it!
i only get it about once or twice a year, because for some reason i forget about it,
and also when i want it, i've got the work car and then i give up because its impossible to find parking.

but i had it today.
and now i'm telling you.
go forth.

hey i finally beat my seven year old in chess!
thanks bryan at jj bean!
taught me a few things such as the dutch defense.
booya. the seven year old went DOWN.

my beloved (in very platonic, fair weather way) spain,
lost this morning to fucking SWITZERLAND.
whaaaaaaaaa. you're the reigning euro champions for heavens sake. where was your defense?
and that is all i have to say about sports.

now back to shoes for a minute.
remember those gwyneth paltrow wonders i showed you last week,
well i saw them in the store and let me tell you,
they are not so nice up close.
and the maggie's, i feel like they are just
a little bit too nerdy.
so after i had dinner with chris,
who's back from ottawa (yipee!),
i left the store empty handed.
what am i going to do?
maybe just replace the birks. boring.

i'm going to hunt down a good tailor to patch up my black skinnies that i blew out.
and then i will say,
WELCOME BACK LOVERS!

a rough start to my weekend,
had me scrambling around looking for the best and greatest cathartic options.
and oh my, cartharsis there was.
friday was nachos and beer and coffee and whatnot with b-heeb,
followed by smoked salmon and salad and birthday cake with great people.
saturday was a late start, deacon's breakfast, and a movie, followed by a bbq with brand-new friends that i met the night before at smoked salmon.
then sunday was supposed to be julie and courtenay day until julie remembered that she was supposed to be at her grandma's house for dinner. oops.
then it was julie and courtenay go to grandma's house and eat and eat eat.
and julie does free laundry! yipee!
and also i got every soccer pick right on sunday! six points! wahoo!
i currently am sitting in the middle of the pack, which ain't too shabby.

ok and before i go,
who remembers this??
thanks to mandy for this gem, which has had me giggling all morning.
SIZE SMALL!!

ok so i'm in fairly desperate need of summer shoes.
every now and again checking out the gravity pope website to see whats new.
well, today was KA-CHING. BULLSEYE.
i found two, very different, but both probably neccesary, pairs of sandals.
i call them
"the gwyneth paltrow side of julie"
and
"the maggie gyllenhaal side of julie"

ok , ok, wednesday, here we go.
yep, its raining something fierce.
but i've got a large cup of coffee, albeit slightly cold at this point.
but i would argue that's what makes a good cup of coffee.
whether it remains good even though cold.
i lie, that's not my argument, it's kathleens. i'm in agreeance.
and speaking of coffee,
i laugh everytime i think of this,
but in order to prevent spilling whilst driving,
according to kenton,
holding your coffee mug in the air,
"cushion the coffee tsunami".

major laundry on the go,
i've brought some of my own over to sneak in.
a combination lack of time and money to get it done chez moi.
tonight i'm going out with the cool kid parents from the kids' school.
we're going drinking on the drive! ya!
i'm the only single, and the only non parent.
being a pisces is sure fun. you can make friends with anyone!
except for people i don't like.
there's a few of those.

downloaded my visa application for france the other day.
my lord there are a lot of factors required of you.
4500$ in the bank,
travel insurance, personal liability insurance, whoa.
plus a round trip plane ticket, (for over a year?? that freaking pricey)
some sort of advance address and job.
i'm wondering if there is not a way to fudge some of this.
this is not a good way to be thinking.

anyways.
happy hump day.

I CHANGED MY OWN BIKE TIRE TUBE YESTERSDAY!!
IT ONLY TOOK ME THREE HOURS!!
at the end though i had to call in the big guns for getting the tire back onto the frame properly.
seth. love ya. see you tonight. thanks for the plastic tire prong things.

Mavis Staples Tells All About Her New Album With Wilco's Jeff Tweedy

this morning i turned into a swimming pool as i walked the kids to school.
very much downpour.
it's going to be a fun day for most of these kidlets,
benjamin has his first triathalon. what??? he's seven.
and it's raining.
in my books that warrants calling the whole thing off and drinking hot cocoa and watching cozy movies.
thank god its my boss whose volunteered to do the driving and the cheering on.
nanny mcjulie is drinking hot coffee and reading fantastic mr fox to the four year old.
and said four year old has her kindergarten orientation this afternoon.
the third annual kindergarten orientation.
she could not be more excited.

i went to the states to buy pants last night.
i bought a hat instead.
then coming back met up with most of my favorites for pizza in surrey.
hilariously we've all vowed to try and get in to the same nursing home later in life.
rook, skip bo, dutch blitz, coercing henry eisenhauers kids to sneak us in some booze.

and i felt so much joy and peace.
for if i can keep these guys until the end of my life,
a happy life indeed.

i'm becoming a product whore.
now look what i found.
its cool.

do you live in an apartment like me?
is composting a pain in the ass like it is for me?
because you hate fruit fly's and stink so much?

LOOK WHAT CAME ACROSS MY PATH!

it fits in your freezer! it's made out of silicone! you just pop out one big frozen brick to compost!

happy friday!
my bum hurts!
(so does my vagina),
because both those things are getting used to my new bicycle and it's seat.
ouch!
but i got a new bicycle!
and it's gorgeous. in an understated way.
black norco road bike with dusty rose handle bar tape.
i rode it home last night, and to work this morning, with relative ease.
the last bike i had (crappy, crap, craphead)
forced me to walk it up certain hills on the commute,
but the new gal made it easy as pie.
pie from scratch. still takes a while.
but i blew through every hill i couldn't do a few years ago. yahoo!

had delicious elevensies with the plett ladies this morning. and also wee henry.
gotta figure out where i'm going tonight.
in my head i'm thinking that there is, like, nine shows going on tonight,
but in reality, there's, like, two.
jazz or jon?
i can bike to jazz, and jon is cheap.

well, off we must go to pick up benny from ecole.
he can read now!! i think he finally broke through something this week.
just this morning i read with him his daily book that school gives him, and i was amaaaaaazed.
poor kid. i think there was a little bit o pressure on him to figure it out.
or maybe the pressure was just on the rest of us and he didn't pick it up at all.
that'd be great.
tata!
happy friday!
KATIE. this is a shout out beacause i didn't email you back yet.
i'm lame.
and really bad about reading emails then forgetting to write back.
LOVE YOU MISS YOU I WANNA COME TO EDMONTON SOON.

hoo.
had a great morning, baked some muffins,
haha and actually had the thought
"did i just put too many chocolate chips in there?"
who thinks that? about chocolate?
but it's ok.
i halfed the flour with whole wheat flour
and threw in some apple sauce in place of some sugar.
all that hard substitution work down the drain because of a heavy hand with the chocolate.
how many people have come undone that way?
i guess many, many, many.

but then a bit of a rough afternoon,
two kids in dire need of some low down time,
dragged to superstore against their wishes.
i feel like i've gotten mad quite a bit this afternoon,
feeling bad about it,
feeling frustrated with the immediacy children require
feeling like a huge case of the mondays.
but then par chance,
i came across this amazing, amazing apartment on design sponge,
and all my grumpiness and mood instantly jumped ship
and in place was a joyous, genuinely emotional response to beauty.
creation and nature are definately one thing,
but bigger responses in me come from man hand created beauty.
a chair.
an apartment.
white walls.
gilt gold.

the idea that the mind of man can think up, feel up, dream up, express oneself through a space.
ugh!
i love how these things garner up an emotional reaction.
oh pieces. stop.

do you feel settled?
in life, or whatever?
i'm wondering if it's possible to feel settled whilst living in the city.
i love the city. all aspects.
and i suppose it might be different if one was partnered up and child rearing,
but i feel like i'm floating/whirling through life without a settle point in view.
should i have some sort of settle point in view?
i'm moving to paris in about 18 months, once work dries up for me here in vancouver,
and it'll be about a year or two year stint.
(unless of course i meet the frenchy ooolala man of my dreams and stay and live there forever embracing socialism and cigarettes and cheap wine full time)
but then what?
i could keep going,
try sweden or norway next..
or come back to vancouver.
maybe get a degree in fashion. hmm.
do people settle anymore?
do single people settle anymore?
or do you go, go, go until you find someone to settle with?

i feel like i'm missing a key strain of thought here.
anyways.
this whole train of thinking just popped into my head and i happened to have my laptop on top of my lap.
thoughts?

i need a hug from a half sweet machiato.
i want desperately to work for garance dore. or scott schuman.
i want to buy the biggest tub of fraser meadow's vanilla yogurt. can you find it anywhere but donalds market? help.
i am thankful for the free morning of grocery storing and butcher shopping.
i want to wear red nail polish for the rest of my life.
i need to find a good seamstress who can copy some clothes for me. help?
i have a shit load of clothes to fold today. which coincides nicely with the episode of glee waiting to be watched.
i watched chris clean out his van while i waited for the red light at hastings and highway 1.
i just ate the dirtiest sandwich. i mean, sure, a ton of protein, but we're talking faaaattty proteins.

i'm figuring out make-up.
for the longest time, i sort of figured that make-up was this thing that helped you look prettier.
and i didn't how that worked, it never looked like me when it was on,
so all i was, was a big mess of confusion when it came to anything beyond benetint and mascara.

but i'm starting to get the idea now that make-up has the ability to add to your style.
to help you polish up the way you like to dress.
much like the manicures that i've in recent monthes become in love with.
and now can't live without.

take red lipstick.
it's been said that a great red lipstick is far superior to even a 1000 cocktail dresses.
either garance dore said it, or gwyneth paltrow.
so true!
and i've finally embraced it.
or rather,
finally overcome all my wierd vanity issues about doing anything so over the top bold.
and over all, pretty sweet.
i love wearing it.
out that is.
but i'm pretty close to wanting to wear it all day at work, too.
look out.
the times they are a changing.

went out to eat with courtenay last night
and because she knew the cooks,
and because cooks like to one up each other on how bizzare the free things will be,
they sent out cured horse meat.
it looked and kinda tasted like prociutto. only saltier.
and good lord we were this close to trying a beef tongue..something. nuts!

right now i'm getting my puff pastry on and whipping up some apple turnovers.
smells great.
i'm glad i went with the labour intensive recipe instead of the canned apple pie filling recipe.
seriously. canned apple pie filling?
says the girl who de thawing the frozen puff pastry!

took a day off this week and went down to seattle for the day,
which was great.
hats off to james moes for a fantastic breakfast reccomendation.
having left at 7.30 in the morning and arriving back in east van after 10,
twas a long day. a good day.

and now i'm sitting here at 2 in the afternoon,
a sore spot in my back,
and a complete free weekend ahead of me.
i am so sleeping in.
and eating at deacon's corner.
do you wanna come with me?

i'm infected.
i'm on the brutalist anti biotic.
i take it and then i'm chilly and flu-y for a couple of hours.
but at least one of them i take at night time when i can sleep through it.

i made some banana muffins
but the baking soda didn't really activate
so they taste bitter.

i'm considering going for a pedicure after work,
but i don't really want to because my feet are nowhere good right now.
you know how you feel you have to clean because the cleaner's coming,
ya same thing over here.

i'm on a hunt for some cream/beige coloured pleated cropped pants. in maybe a light wool.
in plus size?
am i dreaming?
i bought some black ones,
three sizes too big,
dominantly polyester,
but they work.
i 'm holding out for these khaki ones.

COFFEE.