i made myself buy a new journal.
the step towards healing i finally accepted.
i was in denial for a while there.
like i would just have to glance over my shoulder and there he'd be, sitting on my desk.
but he's not coming back.
i still don't think i really believe it, not with my heart, not yet.
but, i bought a new one.
6.50. opus on granville island.
gotta keep moving on, you know?
Monday, May 31, 2004
Thursday, May 27, 2004
Monday, May 24, 2004
Sunday, May 16, 2004
i learned a new word today and i wrote it on my hand so i would remeber what it was and that i would use it.
egregious. egg-ree-shee-ous. it means morally repugnant.
i went over for breakfast (sort of) yesdterday at the ivanhoe. a good walk and talk with the b.
i also 'preached' last night at mosaic. execpt that i had emailed my notes to myself so i could print them off at the church..and it totally got garbled in the transition. so i wung it. ha.
i also got a bracelet today out of the lost and found at work. it is very pretty.
god is reasurring me that i will be ok. both in that i'm absolutly broke for a week, and in that i'm incredibly restless at this moment. i want to move..to do soemthing different..maybe i don't. maybe its just this moment. this is about right..it usually happens at this time of year. the thing is too, that i've got some rad rad commitments going on that i'm excited to be apart of..but the restlessness stirs.
egregious. egg-ree-shee-ous. it means morally repugnant.
i went over for breakfast (sort of) yesdterday at the ivanhoe. a good walk and talk with the b.
i also 'preached' last night at mosaic. execpt that i had emailed my notes to myself so i could print them off at the church..and it totally got garbled in the transition. so i wung it. ha.
i also got a bracelet today out of the lost and found at work. it is very pretty.
god is reasurring me that i will be ok. both in that i'm absolutly broke for a week, and in that i'm incredibly restless at this moment. i want to move..to do soemthing different..maybe i don't. maybe its just this moment. this is about right..it usually happens at this time of year. the thing is too, that i've got some rad rad commitments going on that i'm excited to be apart of..but the restlessness stirs.
Saturday, May 08, 2004
last night went to a housewarming bash for my friend michelle. it was so hip i didn't know what to do.
but then people i knew came and, whew,
i was hip too.
my default setting when it comes to guys, is being weired out. i can't handle any sort of interaction i'm uncertain about.
julie says read blue like jazz. happy.
julie says get to the foundation before it gets to busy. sad.
julie is speaking the word next week and she's a little worried.
julie is listening to eisley.
ben is at ivanhoe.
but then people i knew came and, whew,
i was hip too.
my default setting when it comes to guys, is being weired out. i can't handle any sort of interaction i'm uncertain about.
julie says read blue like jazz. happy.
julie says get to the foundation before it gets to busy. sad.
julie is speaking the word next week and she's a little worried.
julie is listening to eisley.
ben is at ivanhoe.
