Tuesday, August 31, 2004

hey guys i saw this on someones blog, and out of boredom i loved the idea. so its the 'say something about your friends but don't tell them its them'. you can try and guess if you like.

1.I can’t say that I’ve liked you for my whole life, but I’ve probably loved you the whole time. But now I like you. And respect you and your heart. I want the best for your mind and your heart and your life. Move to Vancouver. Ha. You are generous, loyal, compassionate to a fault (nearly), funny, beautiful, stylish and finally an individual. I love it. I love seeing you be a woman, being a liver of life. With you I’m the most real I ever am. The most comfortable. You are life long. Thank god.

2. My oldest friend. Junior high. But now you’re far away. I have long long respected your absolute individuality and confidence. Your satisfaction in who you are is astounding to me. And your love for where you came from, baffles me sometimes. But in you I can see it, and love it too. I love that you are amaaaazing at keeping in touch when it gets to be just a little too long. And the ease in getting together with you even after something like two years.

3. You are the wisest, most confident but at the same time beautifully insecure woman. I can’t believe you’re younger than me some days. And your style leaves me nothing but a copycat. I respect how real you are in everything. With your marriage, your friendships, with your relationship with jesus. I have learned to be more real because of you. You never say anything to fill space, or anything you havn’t thought about. Incredible. Listening to you pray moves me. You are thoughtful, fluidic, and genuine.
You are the most beautiful woman I know. The most beautiful woman I know.

4. People tell us we look it all the time, but most days I do feel like you are truly my brother. Looking at you and your whole life, you have changed me. You change me daily. You (and above wife) are the most influential person in my spiritual life…I guess in all my life. I don’t think I understood unconditional love until I knew your freindship. Seriously. Your guys’ love for me blows me away. Your guys’ love for each other blows me away, and made me think marriage isn’t what I thought, good and bad (hahahaha). You encourage me to trust, to love, to believe. Man I could go on. I don’t have words to tell all of who you are to me. I love you.

5. Ah the mild saga that is our frienship. But keeps getting richer and better with everything. I know I told you this, but you are the friend who I’ve learned the most about myself from. You are a great mirror, an amazing sounding board, and when you don’t give the stupid side hugs, the best hugs come from you too. I am thrilled for you in your life right now. I don’t think I’ve really told you that. I’m so happy that you get to experience all of it, and I’m jealous of that alone, because I want it too. You make me laugh like no one. You make me see life like no one. You are selfless, generous (!), patient, cautious, truthful. 4 years and going. Potatosaladbearsgraffititelecasterboy. Again, I could say more and more. But these are just words. My friend from life.

6. You have always loved me, since coming into my life when I was 15. You’re home has always been open for me, and your kids have been my kids. You have insane amounts of compassion and generosity. Your love to be a mom, to bloom where you’re planted, is a huge example of strength and love. One of many I see in your house and marriage and ministry. I love that you’re friendships see no age borders. I love you that you let me come over with incredibly short notice (or none at all!) and eat the damn fish crackers and drink iced tea.

7. You totally came into my life out of nowhere, full force and it was beautiful. Sneaking off from MI to have talks. Driving out to see you in SK was the one of the best times in my life. Well, not the driving part, but the seeing you on Sunday morning and crying out of fatigue and stress. Falling asleep on your bed and couch listening to sigur ros. Our frienship has taught me redemption. And about forgetting about the shitty stuff and loving anyways. Hmm, that sounds like we slept with each others men. Well we all know how that will never be the case! I love loving you. I love hashing out ideas with you. I love borrowing your books. I love that you make me think about things like I’ve never thought, with one well thought out sentence. I hope you get to eat schnitzel.

Monday, August 30, 2004

oh fuck. Posted by Hello
two (more) reasons why vancouver is the place for me.
one. i totally found the raddest laundromat ever today on commercial drive. crazy aware hippy mexicans. and pretty affordable.
two. i watched a woman walk by with a camcorder duck taped to her foot.

Sunday, August 29, 2004

sun. Posted by Hello
your psyche can't remain so far beyond my comprehension for long.
like a lioness.
preparing to pounce.
you are my meaty gizelle. ARH!

Friday, August 27, 2004

today the weather has no control in which
to call its own.
it changes soley at the whims of my uterus.
all the while muttering under its breath
fuck edgeley, get some stability.

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

oh sweet jesus.
i need vegitables. lots of vegitables. only vegitables.

hmm. or cinnamon toast crunch. in inconceivable quantities.

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

i don't think i've ever seen rain this heavy before.
so i had to go outside.
i am a drowned rat.
its so heavy.
here comes heavy rain. come for cleansing.
sounds like heavy rain. come for cleansing.
downpour on my head.
wash me down the mountain stream where i can find peace of mind.
its coming down
its coming down
its coming down
heavy heavy heavy rain
heavy heavy heavy rain

Sunday, August 22, 2004

SABOTAGE!!!!!!!! julie, i almost stuck your chocolate-face picture up here to freak you out, but it was too complicated, so i emailed it to you. now you can do what you want with it.

oh, i am so in control of your blog now, and it will make you crazy because i wouldn't tell you my password. muhahahahahaha i am evil!


(it's all about control, baby)

Thursday, August 19, 2004

this mouse is a dream.
thanks poo poo.
update THIS.
centennial beach for the b's bday/grad.
rosy cheeks and sandy feet.
it was pretty crazy at dusk when the mosquito's came out of nowhere..and in full force.
but i'm nicely worn out.

i need to learn now how to be open/real even when i have people around me who make me put up walls. i'm not sure how to do this.
its like i don't even want to be real with these people.
but somewhere in there is, that community is exactly that...fighting through walls and defences..even though i'm vehemently opposed.

blair and candace got married tonight. wooo!
julie got adobe photoshop thing with a webpage design program from ben for the mosaic website. wooo!
j: so where is she going to (hypothetically) live?
b: not sure. i hear its pretty cheap to live in sin these days.

Sunday, August 15, 2004

comon comon
julie pick out the ham from your soup.
julie its no good for youp.

experiemental roll number one failed failed failed.
celeste's camera has no light meter and i'm just no good at winging it.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

i just got home.
i havn't been out this late in a while.
oh good. i'm not old.
les belles de quebec.
their last night.
for beer in a basement pub.
then on kits beach until now.
shooting stars.
mellow ocean.

Monday, August 09, 2004

'what if we accept homosexuals into the church.
what will happen??
people's live will get changed! thats what will happen.
they'll hear jesus and god will speak to their hearts..
if he doesn't want 'em to be gay then the holy spirit can handle that.
but for some reason we've made that our battle, our fight
like its up to us?!
thats not what god's called us to do!
god calls us to love people.'

for dave.

Sunday, August 08, 2004

i just wanted it on mine too.
i live in no one's shadow.
buuuut i did swipe this pic from benny's blog.
i'm acutally in the picture. so its good.

 Posted by Hello

Saturday, August 07, 2004

guy in car at light "you need to get a muuuuuffflerrrrr!"
me in car : "i knoooooooooow!"

just got back from dropping in at the french girls house. they came they leave. all of about two monthes. genevieve, marie claude and marie claude.
i adore them. they make me laugh and they make me love humanity. and life, just because they are so excited about it.
and they are probably funniest when they are hungover. they will sing you happy birthday. just because.
so, to the frenchies.
who make talking in a french accent unavoidable.

Friday, August 06, 2004

tonight i was talking to my friend lisa about our church, mosaic.
about how small the community is, and how that leaves no room for anything but who you really are.
and how for both of us, its the only church in our whole lives that celebrates brokeness, and the redemption therein.
then she sited the example of an aquantiance that came to mosaic, and didn't like it beacuse it was too personal. too intimate. she prefered the anominity of a regular, lots of people, service.
and i thought to myself, thats so true. so many put on masks to the one place we should be celebrating the shit thats behind the mask.
we go to receive. we shallowly commune with those we know and those we're comfortable with.
i don't think i even knew what being apart of the body really meant until mosaic. where we celebrate, as part of the worship, rowans one year sobreity.
and its not like i'm always comfortable, but i'm at peace with that struggle.